Deep thoughts, cute shoes

How come everyone wants to live forever, but nobody wants to get old?

121012-1C4259310-tdy-121011-woman-aging-01.blocks_desktop_largeBad news: live long enough, and it’s gonna happen.

You can juice to clean the inside, Botox to plump up the outside, and insist your grandkids call you “Gla-Ma.”  But you cannot escape becoming a Grandma or Grandpa. Thirteen signs that it’s already happening:

-You understand why grandmas like to bring a sweater with them wherever they go, “just in case.”

-You would prefer to eat at the restaurant early, to “beat the crowd.”

-You don’t even consider going out on New Year’s Eve.

-Doctors, dentists, and pilots look alarmingly young.

-You wake up at 6 a.m. without an alarm clock.

-When you receive a Christmas card from a friend, your first thought is, “My God, those kids got old.”

-You’ve considered writing an angry letter to the publishers of any magazine lecturing them on readable font size.

-You know what a font is.

-You tell your family that you don’t need anything for Christmas, and you really mean it.

-You can sing the entire Brady Bunch theme song, but can’t remember what you had for lunch yesterday or why you just walked into the bathroom.

-You don’t know who the celebrities are in People magazine anymore, and what’s more, you don’t care.

-You tell random kids that you see outside in the winter to put a coat on.

And the No. 1 sign that you might be a grandma:

-You’re really looking forward to your next cortisone injection. Because that doctor is SO NICE!

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